The Bench Wars.

I am not a tidy person. Neither is Himself, although his ‘line’ of tolerance tends to crack just before mine does. (And the ensuing .. “debate”.. is not pretty.)  Needless to say we are not exactly raising a family of neat freaks.  “The kids have taken us over the edge” is a well-worn phrase around these parts.

So, as I frequently lament, the whole house is a bit of a bombsite.  But nothing encapsulates the daily battle I wage against The Mess like my kitchen bench. It’s big.  It’s vast. And no matter how hard I try, I can’t keep it clear. The Mess has a triffid-like ability to insidiously fill the available space within 24 hours.

I will mount a concerted attack before Visitors, and I will usually manage to get it clear.  (“Clear” having  something of an individual interpretation.)   But as in many hotspots around the globe, the Battle of the Bench is an ongoing war that may never end.

Witness for yourself my daily battle as I resolve to document this warzone pictorially on a daily basis – faithfully and truly. (Perhaps in the long run the embarrassment factor might be the secret weapon I need to break the enemy.)

Tuesday 28/7.  1100 hrs
Post- on site appointment with Building Designer regarding the renovations. A Pre-Visitor Offensive  was launched the night before, and minor incursions during the before-school rush hour were successfully contained.


Wednesday 29/7.  1100hrs
The enemy gains a foothold.


Thursday 30/7. 0900 hrs
Control has been lost… reinforcements required.


Friday 31/7   1700hrs
A terrible day in the trenches.


Tuesday 4/8  0900 hrs
Despite some (wo)man power being deployed elsewhere on various special projects, some headway has been attained over three days.


The battle continues.



Filed under it's just another manic mum day

11 responses to “The Bench Wars.

  1. I bought a nice looking basket to hold all the stuff S. tended to drop. Then I bought a bigger basket. I clear out the basket when it overflows.

    Just what you need, baskets to trip over as well as a full bench. : )

  2. hahaha! oh lordy, it looks like my dining table. Mind if I copy this idea for a post of my own? I have a kitchen table/island thingy that remains clear, as the troops know I will grow fangs and refuse to cook dinner if they leave their shi…er…stuff on it.

  3. Linda Dalrymple

    oh dear, oh dear,…..another story i relate to, i started laughing so much i got into a coughing fit. I cracked up as in one photo u even left the cupboard door open, and i was watching the progress each time of the scottowels as they moved. i agree with elizabeth about the basket idea, looks great when u buy it in the shop (because it is empty) but never looks the same when u take it home!

  4. I need larger photos. Is that an empty wine bottle?
    Is that a painkiller bottle?
    I went back to check on the paper towels and got caught up on the “items”.

  5. Tracey

    E, if I buy another basket my husband will kill me!
    Rootie, there’s another story in the ‘island bench’ concept – as well as baskets – so I’ll blog that instead of filling up the comments!
    Totally honest photos, Linda – I took it as is – if I shut that wretched corner cupboard door, I may as well continue and tidy up the whole bench (hmmm, wonder why I don’t do that?) – but then I wouldn’t have made you laugh!
    E, actually it’s not an empty wine bottle as such. Well, it was, but it came with a glass stopper, and it’s used for water. It’s the girls’ job to refill the water bottles. You can see how much control I have over that. It’s actually not a bottle for painkillers, it’s a just-about-empty bottle of electrolyte replacement tabs which we use with the long distance cycling. It’s been left out to remind M. to order more!
    Yeah, the paper towel roll. Gotta love how it’s jumped off the holder by the last pic.
    We are just so .. disciplined.. aren’t we…
    Sorry about not being able to do a bigger photo. Another minus for WordPress as compared to Blogger. Mind you, not sure I want anyone to be able to see my Mess in any greater detail!

  6. Linda Dalrymple

    hey everyone, that white basket in fridays photo is the drug basket, i can see there is a repeat presciption folded in the side, between the bananas and the red coffee mug. This is fun tracey, it is like a wheres wally photo ha ha

  7. Tracey

    You’re right Linda, it’s the drug basket. Usually lives on top of the fridge. Careful now, you’re tempting me to really, really let it go, and to take another photo, with an I Spy challenge. Or to label it.

  8. Linda Dalrymple

    please take that next photo, DO NOT hold back, i know that u want to take it.
    go on i dare u to, even double dare!

  9. Tracey

    So you think it can only get worse?! Will you be disappointed to hear that (just) today I’m winning the battle? Well, ok, I will take daily photos again, just for you. I’ll pick up the camera and take an ‘as is’ shot – just for you.

    Or I could pick another hotspot in the house… like the stairs! Or the laundry. Or my eldest daughter’s bedroom….

    (Maybe this is the road to wrestling back control?!!)

  10. Linda Dalrymple

    it is a sad day for me isn’t it, to get excited about a kitchen bench photo… this what my life has come to? what happened to those dreams and ambitons that I wanted from life?….or is this going to be a new hobby for me, i am tempted to see whether rootietoot is going to copy your idea like she earlier suggested.
    I am fighting the urge to investigate, I know I must pull myself together, I don’t have time for new hobbies, i have started so many and finished so few…..

  11. Ha that’s funny. A chronicle of the life and times of a kitchen bench 🙂

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